Change

Wow. I didn’t write on this blog at all in May. The reason for that is that I am trying to change my focus. I think this blog was good for me for a while, but now not so much. I find that it’s not health to “label” myself as a menace to society. The truth is I am a very valuable part of society. :) Which is why I’ve started a new blog. I’m going to work on being grateful for what I do have verses what I don’t have quite yet, and finding joy in the single life. After all, I’m only single once. (So I hope! lol.)

Sincerely,

Sarah

The “M” word

Okay so I know I whine and complain about being single and the fact that I’m not married a lot. I even made a blog up for it. haha. But seriously I blame the society I live in, mainly the church, it teaches me “I must get married to go to heaven.” It’s one of the reasons I came here to Earth. To find that eternal companion. The “M” word- Marriage- is everywhere. It’s insane and super annoying! Maybe I won’t be so worried about it if people would  just get off my back about it. “Get married, get married, get married.” Is preached to us single folk all the freakin’ time! OKAY!! I get it! Marriage is important. Marriage is good. Telling me that isn’t helping! This weekend is stake conference, a young single adult conference, so you know what that means, that stinkin’ M word is getting throw around a lot! I have a hard enough finding a boy to go out on a date with me, let alone marry me!

Luckily tonight’s session wasn’t just about marriage. There was also talk about missions (check ;)) and education. I suppose that is where my aim shall be considering that is something I can control. :) Something to keep my busy and occupied. I’m told that “it” will happen when I least expect it. (I wrote a post about that theory so if you want to know more about it, go look for it.) It’s very confusing. “don’t expect it, but be extremely worried about it” all at the same time. whatever. I’m done. If it happens, it happens. I honestly don’t count on it happening any time soon, if ever.  

Sincerely,
Sarah

Triangle Plan

I’ve had an interesting last two days. Yesterday in my sociology class we talked about marriage and family. One of the big things we talked about was divorce and discussed the pros and cons. Today a random man at work decided to tell me all about his divorce and how he’s glad to be rid of her. Wow, I know. TMI. (too much information.) Then I received a text from my aunt telling me after less than a month of being divorce my uncle (or ex uncle now I guess is what I call him?) is getting remarried at the end of the month. So yeah. Lot of talk of divorce in the last two days. Not sure I ever want to get married now.

I told Cathy about it and we got talking about marriage, and how freaked out we can be about it, and I stated the obvious fear: how can we know that it will last forever? She then shared with me something she heard from her stake president a while back. He said, “You fall in a hole, and you fall out of bed, you don’t fall in love” and explain that when he married his wife he thought he loved her, but looking back now he’d say that he just really liked her a lot. “Love takes work. If you don’t work at it, it goes away.”

Then we got talking about the triangle analogy I’ve heard a couple times in my single life in preparing me for marriage. That marriage is a three way commitment. God is at the top corner of the triangle, husband at one, and the wife at the other. As the husband and wife are moving upward toward God they are moving closer to each other. :) In thinking about this, and couples who follow this triangle plan, such as my Dad and Stepmom, they are the happiest couple I know. I believe it’s because they are following this triangle plan. :)

I hope to find a love like theirs one day. In the meantime I’ll work on what I can, moving upward on my side of the triangle towards God. ;)

Love,
Sarah

If I were a Star..

On last night’s episode of Dancing with the Stars, they picked their most memorial year of their life and danced in honor of it. If I were a Star, and had the chance to be on the show, I would pick the year 2002, the year my Mom passed away from Breast Cancer. I would dance the waltz to Hillary Duff’s song “Someone’s Watching over me” in a pink dress (the color of Breast Cancer awareness.) with Derek Hough as my partner, because he is my favorite professional dancer on the show. He is very talented! I love his choreography the most, and he knows how to make his partner shine. Plus he’s super attractive. That doesn’t hurt, just sayin’, I think we’d look good together. Can you see it? I can. If I were any of the judges I’d give us all 10s. ;D

Love,
Sarah

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nBTh5Q2jgfM

Daffodils

Yesterday I received quite the surprise. My Dad came into my work with daffodils. I asked him why, what’s the occasion? He said it’s daffodil day. :) I’ve concluded I like daffodil day. :) They were just buds when he gave them to me with the promise that if I put them in water they will bloom. With the help from my roommate, I put them in a vase and sure enough shortly after they started opening up. I sent him a picture of the blossoming flowers and said “Wow! The buds are already starting to open up! Cool!” and he wrote back “So pretty! Just like you.” Awe! :) Is my Dad the sweetest or what? :D I feel so loved. I may not have a husband, or a boyfriend, but at least I know I have a great Dad who loves me for who I am, and is always there to help me blossom. ;)

Love,
Sarah

Honestly

Could you love somebody like that?
Could you attract someone like that?
Could you go where people can't see someone like me
Could you do that?

Would you face me
Make me listen to the truth even if it breaks me
You can judge me, love me
If you're hating me
Do it honestly

All I see are stepford-like lives
Needles and knives
Beautiful lies
Bringing out the green in your eyes
A perfect disguise for envy and pride

Face me
Make me listen to the truth,
Even if it breaks me
You can judge me, love me
If you're hating me do it honestly

You can tell me (x5)

Face me
Make me listen to the truth,
Even if it breaks me
You can judge me, love me
If you're hating me

Would you,
Face me,
Make me listen to the truth even if it breaks me
Judge me, love me
If you're hating me
Do it honestly

[Song Lyrics for Kelly Clarkson’s Honestly]

I love this song. I feel like screaming this to those boys who lead me on. If you’re hating me, you can tell me, do it honestly.

Love,
Sarah

I spit on you

That is my new phrase. I was talking to Cathy about boys, like we usually do, about how stupid they are and how they should just love us. We are awesome. So awesome we should have a line out the door of guys begging to ask us out. Seriously! They have no idea what they are missing. They are SO chungo. I spit on you! I spit on all of you. :P

Sincerely,
Sarah